Irish Lion in Bloomington, IN

Irish Lion – Map
irishlion.com
212 West Kirkwood Avenue
Bloomington, IN 47404
(812) 336-9076

Starving Auctioneers Rating: 5 Gavels out of 5 - TOP TEN

The Certified Auctioneers Institute (CAI) is many things to many people. Of great interest to Starving Auctioneers is that CAI presents many opportunities to eat at new and interesting restaurants with old and bloviating auctioneers. One highlight of the Bloomington, Indiana restaurant scene from last year’s CAI was the Irish Lion. It was one of the must attend places at this year’s gathering. The Irish Lion is a small Irish or British pub style restaurant that is only about four Starving Auctioneers wide and located just off the courthouse square in downtown Bloomington (If Bloomington can be said to have a ‘downtown’)

CAI dinners are more like the Battle of Waterloo than a pleasant, civil culinary experience. Typically a literal herd of balding, out of shape auctioneers will descend on an eating establishment like a Biblical plague and demand as many tables as are available and then attempt to negotiate with the unsuspecting wait staff for free dessert. What follows is consumption on a near epic scale. Such was the state of affairs when a group of Starving Auctioneers showed up at the Irish Lion on Tuesday evening. The group included (L to R in picture) Paul Grist, Brian Braun, your humble blogger, Tim Kruse, Bryan Knox, Michael Nance, Em Barran, David Helmer, and Jeffrey Oberling. A frightening gang with amazingly bad hair to be sure and not a group you want to cross when they are hungry or smell a motivated seller.

This wasn’t the first trip to the Irish Lion for most of the group; it wasn’t even the first trip that week! Dinners included roast duck, fried fish, mutton pie and lamb chops. Dinner was followed by dessert which was OUTSTANDING and far above the fare one normally finds at a Starving Auctioneers' hang out. Try the Irish Apple Walnut Cake…do it. For the second year the Irish Lion was the unofficial Starving Auctioneers' HQ and it should be your first stop whenever you are in Bloomington.

The stories and drinks flowed freely for over two hours of dinning and dialog. Topics included appropriate shirt length, the spelling of waitress’ names, deer meat processing, bid calling and auction fish tales and of course the auction that got away. David Helmer even told some scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago.

Florentine in Columbus, OH

Florentine - Map
florentinerestaurant.com
907 West Broad St.
Columbus, OH 43222
(614) 228-2262

Starving Auctioneers Rating: 4 Gavels out of 5

The most frustrating table to wait on in the food service world is one with two auctioneers when neither has an auction in morning. They just talk and talk and talk and don’t order dessert. To add insult to injury you have to wonder if two people so poorly dressed could possibly be good tippers. Such was the case when Peter and Mike Brandly, CAI, AARE had dinner last week at a Columbus institution, Florentine. The Florentine is a family owned American/Italian restaurant that has had the same menu and sign out front since the Eisenhower Administration.

A short walk from downtown Columbus, the Florentine has been serving Americanized Italian food long before the Olive Garden made unlimited bread sticks cool and pushing cheap house wine the industry standard. The Florentine is the perfect Starving Auctioneers hang out: local, fast, reasonably cheap, and a working class joint. Dinner at the Florentine won’t change your life but it will fill your belly.

Both men had to stop talking long enough to give some serious attention to the menu, after that the orders came out quickly. Mike ordered the fish and Peter the veal. Peter often orders veal as a test of his dinner companions, Mike passed the test in that he did not recoil in disgust, as many often do, and he got a sticker for his decorum. Dinner started at 7 PM and they closed the place down a little after 10 PM. They sat in their booth so long the first waitress gave up and went home and the manager had to call up a new arm from the bullpen. Despite their appearance they tipped well.

This is first review with Mike Brandly but won’t be the last. Mike is a restaurant connoisseur and has assembled a list of future restaurants for review that covers most of Ohio. Mike’s specializes in two simple things: Absolute auctions and finding places to eat in between absolute auctions. In fact his dedication to these two missions often comes at the cost of any type of modern hair care or even simple combing.

Red Pig Bar-B-Q and Deli in Johnson City, TN

Red Pig Bar-B-Q and Deli - Map
2201 Ferguson Road
Johnson City, TN 37604
(423) 282-6586

Starving Auctioneers Rating: 4 Gavels out of 5

It is always special when you are afforded the opportunity to fellowship with a great auctioneer and good friend on his home turf. Such was the occasion last month when Peter called on Travis Royston, CAI, CES, GPPA of Johnson City, Tennessee. Travis is a block of man. The legend says he is 7 foot tall and once killed a wild bear with the carcass of coyote while saving a bus full of red headed orphan children from a runaway locomotive. Truth be told not all those kids were orphans.

Travis is a model Starving Auctioneer: hard worker, champion bid caller, big eater and marginal dresser. Peter was in Travis’ home town delivering a collection of antique water pumps and water rams. If you don’t know what those are and why someone would collect them you can join the club. Travis bought’em, Peter delivered’em that is all you need to know for this blog. Peter dropped the pumps off on his way to Asheville, North Carolina and Grove Park Inn Arts and Crafts Convention (pottery pick up). Having sold cars in the morning and driving all afternoon and evening Peter and his wife (Paige Gehres) and friends, Brian & Annalisa Henslee were ready for some BBQ.

Being a fire fighter (honest) and a Starving Auctioneer, Travis knew just the place: Red Pig Bar-B-Q and Deli. Like most local BBQ this was a homespun place where the owner shakes your hand when you enter and the simple menu has a few items ‘everyone’ had to get.

Everyone ordered a BBQ pork sandwich and a much ballyhooed twice baked potato. Peter also ordered the salad which had more toppings then it had lettuce. This was perfect because, as has previously been mentioned on this blog, a Starving Auctioneer salad is more an excuse for eating dressing and fix’ins then an exercise in eating healthy. We arrived near closing time and thus had our run of the place and sat at a large round table in the corner that Travis said was on permanent reserve for the local politicians and power brokers, that is of course why WE sat there.

The food was good but the stories were better. Travis regaled his dinner companions with tales of auctions, family and friends. The most memorable was the story of Travis’ friend who wished to get into the chicken and egg business on a small scale. After setting up the coop and equipment this friend purchased 50 laying hens and 50 roosters for those hens to mate with, the friend knew were eggs came from at least. After a few rough nights in the chicken coop he called Travis concerned, Travis advised his city folk friend that it is not ‘religious with chickens’ and they don’t mate for life and one rooster can do the deed. Heathen chickens…

UPDATE: Starving Auctioneers fans can expect more of Travis’ stories as he is planning to make a family trip to Ohio’s Amish Country this summer and his travels to the Starving Auctioneer’s home state will surely generate some much needed blog content.